This is the Story of a Gal-Amarula Gal

"The first time i saw you , really , i didn't like you! Who is this BITCH ?"Denis says. To much of my surprise, that is my first impression on most people. Apparently I am this unapproachable, stone faced, petite little devil!!

As I write this am actually tearfull, sad in some ways but yet again content with who  I am , and what I represent. I have learnt the hard way and yet still,with all the times i've fallen down , i always seem to get back up !!!!!!! The next time i hear that phrase, "You are a strong woman Daughtie", I will go insane !!!!!Behind all this bold and charm, beauty and glamour , inside lives are very lonely, yet loving weak but never broken girl. '"Girl?" you ask , "but  havent you done sex work for like 10 years ?", "there's certainly nothing girly about you!"

This is the story of a girl, who never knew her father, lived in constant doubt of  for his love and yearning for his affection. A mommy's girl, spoilt in every sense, an exact replica to her beauty, charm and zeal. A girl left at her point of need, naive , scared, vulnerable. Left to face the world alone , in the best way she knows how, looking, searching for answers she does not have the questions to.

This is the story of a girl, who sort refuge in a cold, middle aged perverted man , mistook candy gifts for affection,advances for  Love, trusted without blinking an eye all in the name to fill the emptiness in her world. Defiled, shamed and out on the streets with no one to love and care for her but her self.

This is the story of a girl ,who slept out on a cold raining night, moving form house to house seeking food and shelter ,and suddenly all that changed  to hunting men so just she could lay her head on a warm pillow. This girl turned woman overnight! Crying every night as these men had pleasure with her tiny body,exploded, shouted with ecstasy as they climaxed. Garbage is what she felt like. Will she ever find love , she wondered. On a random night searching for a man to prey on , she found him , the man who would plunge her into her worst nightmare, a decade older than she , he knew all the right strings to pull, all the rights words to say. This girl now turned a wife, to a man a decade older than her, he knew all the right strings to pull, all the rights words to say. Did he Love her?,  she will never know , because he's gone!,  gone with the wind , just like her dear parents, alone again , wounded, hurt, but not despaired!

This is the story of a girl , This girl now a mother. Love did come, in the form of a bouncing baby boy! A bundle of love , brought back hope into the life of this girl, who choose to believe in love again,who rose up from ashes to beauty! This is the story of a girl,  a girl turned woman ,a woman  turned wife,  a wife turned widow , a widow turned mother. This is the story of a woman of absolute Resilience, Power and Love !

This is the story of Amarula Gal!!!!!!

Sex Work is Work !!!!!!!!!!!

Published on 12/08/2011

As the sex workers' activist, Daughtie Ogutu, 27, wants these girls to be allowed to contribute to nation building. To her, sex work is a trade, like any other, writes JOYCE MUTHEU

You claim to be the first woman in Africa to openly declare your PROFESSION as a sex worker? Really?

Yes, I wanted to put a  human face to ‘sex worker’. Many sex workers speak out in public but usually under a silohutte to protect their identity. But I decided it’s time to put a face to what other see as an object of defilement ,a face so that others can realate with.

How did you get into sex work?

After losing my parents to Aids in my teens, I relocated from Nairobi to the Coast. While there, I faced many challenges so I started to engage in sex work at the age of 15. I have worked as a sex worker for ten years and that’s why I speak about it with passion.
 Fahamu, what is it all about?

Fahamu is a pan-African social justice organization , The program that i work under is called the Reclaim Initiative, which offers support to LGBTI and Sex Worker's Movements across Africa!

It  all  started in the First ever sex workers Conference in Johannesburg , which I attended and one of the outcomes was to create an African movement dedicated to fighting for the rights’ of sex workers.

Together with other members, we formed the African Sex Workers Alliance (ASWA) To which i am a one of the Founders and a Board Member — a platform for educating sex workers across the continent on their rights. 

Later, we formed the Kenya chapter — Sex Workers Alliance (KSWA) —. Last year, I left my post as the Kenyan co-coordinator of Aswa to join Fahamu as a programme associate in the Reclaim Initiative.

What does your work entail as a sex worker’s activist?

I meet policy makers to dialogue on the rights of sex workers and I educate the girls on their rights. At times, I engage with members of Parliament. I particularly remember during the ‘Warembo Ni Yes’ constitution rally where I was the only ‘abnormal’ woman who stood up pushing for the rights of an otherwise illegitimate group.

What rights are these?

Sex workers’ rights are fundamental human rights. For instance, sex workers are denied healthcare services in hospitals because of their work. There is also the right to security because they are often raped or mugged at night while working. We did our research and discovered that instead of enforcing the law police, city and municipal council officers just harass and assault sex workers.

what gains have have you made in your activism?

First, sex workers have gained visibility. Our message is that: "We are here and are part of the community, but you have silenced us and ignored us." So being seen and heard is an achievement for us.

We have also significantly reduced the stigma. Gone are the days when we were called by derogatory words like prostitutes or sluts. Moreover, our interaction with civil society organisations has secured us donor funding for our projects. Finally, we have managed to incorporate sex workers in condom distribution and peer education.

Engaging in commercial sex is a crime in Kenya. What’s your take on that?

Our Constitution is vague on sex work; because a term like prostitution has not been officially defined yet the act is termed illegal.

Does this situation pose any legal challenges for you?

Yes, although the confrontation between the City Council and sex workers activists’ has always been hands-off. Many times, we end up in police cells or in courts but there is never proof that we are sex workers. In the end, we are forced to answer to charges of loitering with intent.

What challenges do you face as a sex workers’ activist?

The community is intolerant and blames us for being immoral. There are also women who accuse us of stealing their husbands, infecting them with STDs, breaking families and moral values.

From your observation, how rampant is sex work in Kenya?

There are new trends in the industry, the latest being the presence of male  sex workers. There is also the strong presence of minorities like gays, lesbians, transgender, bisexuals and intersex among us.

In a nutshell, what do sex workers want?

We want sex work to be decriminalised in Kenya.This way, sex workers would be able to operate in a safe environment, enjoy health and labour rights and be part of trade unions. In return, the government can earn revenue from sex work through tax, because the industry has a lot of untaxed money.

So are you still a commercial sex worker?

I am an inactive sex worker, that is, one who no longer engages in the activity. But when relating with sex workers, I identify myself as one of them and I even dress in their colours so that they can relate with me.

Sex Work is Work !!!!!!!

The Standard | Online Edition :: Sex workers business

www.standardmedia.co.ke

As the sex workers' activist, Daughtie Ogutu, 27, wants these girls to be allowed to contribute to nation building. To her, sex work is a trade, like any other, writes JOYCE MUTHEU

African Sexualities - Available @ Fahamu!!!!!

Sylvia Tamale has given us a jewel of a book, drawing together a dazzling array of contributors from all over the continent to offer most eloquent repudiation of the many myths about sexualities in Africa.

This landmark collection deserves to be widely read !!!!!!!

Andrea Cornwall-professor,School of Global Studies,University of Sussex , UK

WHEN I DARE TO BE POWERFUL - By Zawadi Ny'ong'o Amust read !!!!!!!!!

A Publication by Akina Mama wa Afrika (AMwA), written by Zawadi Nyong’o and edited by Christine Butegwa and Solome Nakaweesi-Kimbugwe.

AMwA has been working in partnership with sex worker activists in Uganda and other countries in East Africa. This oral history project allowed women to speak for themselves to try and better understand the politics behind sexuality, sexual rights and sex work.

The research tries to present the multiple dimensions of women’s lives,

"Women who happen to have worked or still work in the sex industry. Women in their complexity, full of personality, experiences, dashed dreams and high hopes. Mothers, sisters, lovers, wives, women with vulnerabilities and women with strength. The book presents the interwoven tapestry of narratives that tell merely a thread of women’s life stories, rejecting the “single story”, telling neither the negative stereotype, nor the politically correct narratives, reinforcing and debunking myths. These stories were told not to make an argument but to share a herstory."

Amarula Gal

Hi Reader!

Since you most of you have always asked if i have i Blog?
Well, here it is!

Amarula Gal -A woman of great strength ,A lover, a friend, a  mother, a daughter, a sister and so much more. I am a sex worker YES! but that is not who i am but what i do! I am so much more than you might want to limit yourself to think , sometimes i surprise myself even. Everyday i realize that there are parts of me that i am yet to discover!!!!!!

Ask and i'll answer it , if you like  can get an expert opinion about it.

So sit back, get your hot cup of chocolate or better yet a double shot of Amarula! and lets have an "Open Talk"